Time to Find Hoffa

Well, the workers at Yankee Stadium have (thankfully) unearthed the David Ortiz jersey buried in the concrete beneath the Bombers’ future grounds. Somewhere the God of Metaphors has breathed a sigh of relief, as the knucklehead who thought he was cursing the Yankees by sinking the uniform of one of the Sox’ most important offensive cogs didn’t quite recognize the misplaced intentions of his actions and the f*cked-up symbolism of his prank. We offer our gratitude: the Yankees and their construction crew have done everyone who roots for the Sox a favor, from those who appreciate a literate metaphor to those of us concerned about our amiable slugger. Let’s see what happens tonight. We’re hopeful that maybe the Yankees will regret not leaving that jersey right where it was, mired in a literal slump.

13 comments… add one
  • As if this story couldn’t get any more stupid (stupider?), now comes word the Yankees might sue the guy who buried the shirt.
    Um, A. On what grounds; and, B. What would they expect to recover from a part-time construction worker?
    Of course, had this happened in Boston, the leadership triunverate would have sold the chunks of concrete, put up the shirt for auction and also auctioned off the chance to refill the whole. And they would have made a lot of money, too.
    Oh, the humiliation.

    I'mBillMcNeal April 13, 2008, 3:18 pm
  • Hole.
    Refill the hole.

    I'mBillMcNeal April 13, 2008, 3:19 pm
  • Superstition is a big part of sports (see Boggs, Wade) but I agree, this is an asinine story, though kind of amusing.
    But hey, maybe the intended curse backfired, and it was that stupid buried #34 jersey that has been cursing Big Papi. If Ortiz explodes tonight with a four home run barrage, I might become a believer…

    Hudson April 13, 2008, 4:41 pm
  • I hope you are right with that theory, Hudson!
    I also think this whole thing is very funny.

    DUFF - SF April 13, 2008, 5:13 pm
  • This has got to be the most retarded thing I’ve heard in quite a while. Funny, too, but also dumb.
    I totally agree that Ortiz’ jersey should’ve stayed buried, and maybe they should’ve added #24 jersey to it as well. Thankfully, we won’t find out (tonight) just how it affects Ortiz as he’s not in the lineup. Per Pete A., Manny is DHing.

    yankeemonkey April 13, 2008, 5:48 pm
  • It’s retarded, but that dude probably deserved to be punished. Hey, if you can’t stand the consequences, don’t pull the prank.

    Lar April 13, 2008, 7:25 pm
  • This could have been worse. He could have stolen and then buried Big Papi’s jock strap.

    SoxFan April 13, 2008, 7:54 pm
  • Manny DHing presumably means we get both Ellsbury and Crisp in the lineup.
    Not a bad thing, given the circumstances with Papi. Get these guys on base, steal and bunt them over, try to fluster/distract Hughes…

    Hudson April 13, 2008, 7:56 pm
  • the guy probably doesn’t deserve too much more than to get fired from this job…more for not thinking than being malicious…i didn’t hear that the yanks were thinking of suing him bill, but rather that they questioned if criminal charges would be appropriate, equally absurd i suppose…at any rate, from what i know, it’s not uncommon for construction workers to leave little souveniers behind when they work on a project…they don’t usually brag about it, and not many projects draw as much media attention as rebuilding yankee stadium…

    dc April 14, 2008, 7:28 am
  • oh, and the rest of the story is that the yanks have decided to give the jersey to the jimmy fund to be auctioned off…kind of odd, but maybe papi would sign it to give it some value, and make it more than just a goofy novelty item…if they can get $1100 on e-bay for a corn flake shaped like illinois, a signed jersey buried under cement in the new stadium should be worth big bucks…

    dc April 14, 2008, 7:50 am
  • Donated to the Jimmy Fund for auction, eh? That’s a nice end to a completely idiotic story. All’s well that ends well, as the Man once wrote.
    On a not so cheery note, I’m hearing reports that Joba’s dad apparently collapsed at his home in Lincoln, Neb., and is hospitalized in critical condition. Joba has left the team.
    Hang in there, kid.

    I'm Bill McNeal April 14, 2008, 11:15 am
  • Yeah Bill, the story is all over mlb.com. It’s never good to see that, no matter what team they play for. I hope he’s okay.

    Atheose April 14, 2008, 5:14 pm
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