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Sox Gamers/Postmortems

Way to Go Tito/Ace High: Sox-Tigers Gamer II

SF had posted a gamer congratulating Terry Francona on his 500th win as manager of the Red Sox, while I had posted one noting that Josh Beckett just completed a stellar May while opposing starter Armando Galarraga is trying to forget the previous month.

Then we noticed the other had posted and each deleted our own. Oops.

So now you get this gamer mashup. Enjoy, and comment away!

102 replies on “Way to Go Tito/Ace High: Sox-Tigers Gamer II”

Yeah. We’re low-brow Sox fans, who appreciate a good penis joke. Like the Yanks gamer tonight!
And on that note, Pedroia singles to start the game. I like.

This lineup is great. I know it’s reactionary after three games, but I so love the 1-5.
Boy those three outs came fast after Drew’s bomb.

Then three outs on 5 pitches. Well, I guess you can’t blame them for wanting to get the jump on him after the first two at-bats. Youk’s was hit very hard.

Beckett getting squeezed a bit, but is just doesn’t matter. Strikeout number one.

Oh, come on, Porcello = Piglet. It didn’t take too much to figure that out. If you think last night’s game thread was obscure, you ain’t seen nothing. Just wait!

SF –
I am missing many many brain cells. You have to go slowly and use short words.

Uh oh, Beckett having a “conversation” with the umpire after the inning, glove over his mouth. I’d throw my grandma down a flight of stairs for a chance to listen to what Beckett says there.

Well at least the strikezone is small for Galarraga too. Did you know Armando is German for “whale’s vagina”?

Yeah, if he wants to say something he needs to wait until he sees the strikezone for Galarraga.
Which, incidentally, got much larger there against Varitek.

God I love Beckett’s fastball that starts inside and runs back across the plate. It gives my baseball-penis an enormous erection.
Sorry if that’s, uhh, a little too explicit.

Wait what was the controversial call there? I missed it and Gameday doesn’t have a lot of details.

I’m listening to Eck and Donny on NESN, IBM. No watered down BS for me.
Plus I don’t want to hear the shitty ESPN announcers talk about the Nantucket Hiker, if you know what I mean.

Laird you cocksucking motherfucker, trying to bunt for a hit.
Eckerseley calling him out for being a douchebag. I love you so much Eck.

Holy potatoes that curveball is unbelievable. Another knee-buckling backwards K.

You guys should have heard Eckerseley going on about how much of an asshole Laird was for trying to bunt for a hit last inning.

No sweetie, you can’t put the leftover fried rice away just yet. Why? Because you just can’t. You have you wait until after the game. No, I know it’s gunna get stale, but… JUST DONT DO ANYTHING PLEASE OKAY?

I know you just walked Ordonez, but give Cabrera an IBB. Just do it. Please do it?

Beckett just threw a cutter. I didn’t know he had a cutter. Why are you throwing a cutter?
Curveball hit VERY far, but Ellsbury tracks it down. Please do not walk anyone else, because you don’t want to face Cabrera a 4th time.

Eck is off-base. The Tigers need baserunners. Get on base, any how, any way. It’s not like they were down 9-0 in the eighth or ninth when he did it.

NO HITTER NO HITTER NO HITTER! JOSH BECKETT IS THROWING A NO HITTER. A NO HITTER. HE HAS NOT ALLOWED A HIT YET. I WONDER IF HE CAN COMPLETE THE NO HITTER.
what?

SF, it’s not like it’s a speedy hitter: it’s Gerald Laird. The man has 12 career stolen bases. If Granderson did it, sure. But Laird doing it is lame.

It doesn’t work, YF. I did it during Lowe’s, Lester’s, and Nomo’s, driving my mom nuts.
Also, you know what else is interesting? That Jeter hasn’t torn his knee apart in all these years despite how many games he’s played at shortstop.

Another strike called a ball, hit for a fucking double.
This is a joke. You suck, ump.

Winning tonight means Sox finish this 10-game road trip .500 at worst.
I realize we have a big lead, but perhaps time to pull Beckett.
Kotsay replaces Drew in RF.

Pedroia makes an error, sigh. Should been at least an out.
Beckett getting some bad luck, between the ump and his defense.

What the hell, Pedroia?! Get the sure out. Why is BECKETT STILL PITCHING?
The Sox batted for like 1/2 hour, they have a ten run lead, he’s thrown 110+ pitches, and he’s the most important pitcher on the staff. Is Tito hammered?

Youk mouths “pull me” to Tito, then walks off the fiend. He’s furious.

This is on Tito and Green. Why the FUCK did he leave Beckett out for so long? And if Green makes a goddamned ROUTINE play then Youk doesn’t get stepped on.
Unbelievable, a ten run lead turns into a potential clusterfuck, thanks to idiotic managing.

Ump squeezes Bard. The Sox have given the Tigers six outs this inning. I bet a lot of really crappy teams would score runs if given six outs.
Thank you, Tito (and the defense).

ANOTHER? Jesus fucking christ what is this ump’s problem? First pitch to Laird was perfect.

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