Looks like this Halladay guy might be kinda good. I looked into it because I had not heard of him before last night. Soon I must crawl into one of those awful beasts called an “airport”, which gave me insomnia last night, which in turn gave me the time to watch this unknown “Doc’s” performance on the DVR at 3am. He_was_so_choice. If you have the means, I highly recommend picking one of him up for yourself.
Speaking of A Day 4 years off, the rejuvenated Carl Pavano can angle for all sorts of rejuvenated motivation to shut up morons like me that have been mad at him for the last half-decade, give or take a WTF. Morons that, given choice between seeing the Yankees lose a playoff game to Pavano, or, having jumper cables clamped to their man-boobs with the other ends hooked to a deep cycle marine battery, would choose electricity. Maybe you can’t afford a deep cycle marine battery. Soaking your baby-maker parts in sugar water and sitting naked on a fire ant mound should suffice. Another option? Rub Sterno into your scalp, light your hair on fire, and put it out with a roofing hammer.
Andy Pettitte hopes to send the Bombers back to the Bronx up 2-0. QUESTION: if, after tonight, New York holds a two-game lead and Hughes can’t close it out in game three, should they start CC short-rested or let AJ start on a short leash considering that one-game buffer? ANSWER: FALSE. Trade AJ for a bag of Golden beets and an interest in a suck-ass Premiere League Club to teach players learn how to whine to the officials.
It’s fascinating to me that Cliff Lee, such an important part of the Phillies machine last year and part of the three-way trade that sent him to Seattle (and eventually to Texas that landed Doc in Philly) dominated the Rays last night. James Shields (semi-infamous for engaging a brawl wherein he did not hit Coco Crisp, who did not hit Shields either) provides intrigue in St. Pete.
That’s right, you’re not from Texas.
Lineups to follow, comment away.
The Rays are getting POUNDED again…hehehe.
1-2-3 first for dickhead Pavano…and he celebrates after 1 inning.
Rock this asshole.
I do hate Pavano.
Die in a fire, Rays. I hope the Rangers can seal the deal at home.
I hope they’re at least driven to burn their ace for ALCS.. if the Yanks even make it anyways..
We’re in trouble…Pettitte throws about 20 pitches and it ends up in a leadoff single anyway…this could be a long game.
Pitcher’s best friend!
HUGE DOUBLE PLAY!!!! WHAT A PLAY BY JETER!!!! Beautiful.
K’s Mauer…nice.
Cano gave it a ride, but this is the stadium that doesn’t give up HRs..
Hitting every ball right at them…I guess it’s good we’re hitting the ball hard but it would be nice to get off to a good start for once?
DOUBLE FOR SWISH!!!! OK…let’s DO THIS!!!!
Except to Tex Lar… :)
Hip Hip…fail.
Tough beginning to the inning.
I looked away, looked back and they showed a replay, and I was like, wtf, before realizing it was a replay.
Even their crappy outs are productive. One out, dangerous spot here.
The wheels are coming off in the 2nd inning…
4 pitch walk to load the bases..
Walks the bases loaded…with 1 out…
0-1. SAC fly. 2 outs.
Sac fly, not the worst thing in the world, but let’s get out of it, and take our swings at Pavano.
Limited the damage…time for Pavano to pay. Now.
Gets out of it, but now Yanks down a run.
The ump does have an erratic strike zone, though maybe that’s just me.. is there an online resource for that?
This asshole has a liberal strikezone…it’s wider than Paris HIlton’s vagina.
RIDICULOUS!!! SHOULD BE 3-0 COUNT!!!!
But only for Pavano, as AP didn’t get some calls last inning..
I mean, Pavano has thrown like ONE FUCKING STRIKE so far!!!!!
Exactly Lar…exactly.
And as we’ve seen, when the ump fucks us with a ridiculous strikezone, it kills us because we take so many pitches.
I hate umpires. We need robots.
Pavano’s mustache offends me.
It would be fantastic is we could just ONE FUCKING TIME get off to a good start instead of always letting these no-name, loser pitchers mow us down for 6 innings…
SLIDING GRAB BY SWISH!!!! Nice. 2 quick outs.
Ya, nice play by Swish. Let’s get them.
I mean, wow…seriously ump???? How is this moron in the postseason??? 2 strikes to Mauer are called balls….
Quick 1-2-3 inning for Pettitte….COME ON OFFENSE!!!! BRING THE NOISE, BRING THE FUNK!!!!
LEADOFF DOUBLE FOR GRANDERSON!!!!! We’re in business…
Granderson didn’t miss a HR by much, so a second double by the Yanks, this time with no outs, let’se e if they take advantage of it..
SINGLE FOR TEX!!!! 1st and 3rd, no outs…COME ON AROD!!!!
Tex with a fast single to the left field, one hops the leftfielder and Granderson can’t score as a result, though maybe a better read he could’ve score. Still, first and third, no outs and heart of the lineup coming right up.
SAC FOR AROD!!!!! 1-1!!!
ARod with a deep flyball that makes for an easy sac fly. Tex stays at first.
I’ll do the color Lar, you got the play-by-play…
AROD hit that one to RF…they always say that’s when he is on his game when he hits it the opposite field. Good sign!
Cano smacks out to the base of the wall on right field. It was such a rocket that he can only get a single out of it, as it takes a lucky (for Minny) bounce right to the right fielder. Tex does go to third on the play.
Robi Cano has a god damn gorgeous stroke. Beautiful.
Cano is heating up…which bodes well for us.
Swisher now up with a chance to get an RBI or two or three. Pavano is a little flustered, but there’s still only one run on the board..
That fucking outside pitch for a strike…I am getting angry.
Swisher did basically the one thing he can’t do to score the run, a tailor made double play up the middle, and Pavano got out of that one with just one run.
Swisher killed that rally. Fuck.
Nice job Andy…he settled down like crazy.
LANCE! Too bad there’s no one on base..
BERKMAN GOES DEEEEEEEEEEEEEEPPPPPPP!!!!!! 2-1!!!!!
Berkman comes through.
You read that right.
Well, we got the lead…
AP is on some kind of roll now, knock on wood..
(Knock, Knock, Knock)
Granderson is HOT, HOT, HOT!!!! Like Dexter Poindexter!!!
There is that stupid outside ball, I mean strike…
Come on ARod…do something awesome!
AROD SINGLE!!!! We’re in business again…LET’S DO THIS CANO!!!
Don’t throw a wild pitch Carl…
Cano = fail
That really, really, really sucked.
Some non clutch non-productive outs for the Yanks. With some productive outs they might’ve tack on at least a run..
This could be a turning point…
Let’s see if Swisher can make it moot and redeem himself a little bit.
And again the Yanks let Pavano off the hook easy. Let’s hope it does not come back to bite them..
Swisher chokes again.
That could really fuck us.
Way to show up Swisher…just like last year.
2-2. Thanks Swish.
They really need to pick up Pettitte…he has pitched a great game and the stupid bats are blowing it.
Pettitte doesn’t get the EXACT SAME FUCKING PITCH that Carl’s been getting all game long…
It’s all falling apart…we blew it.
They better not let Pettitte’s great game go to waste…not to mention allowing CARL FUCKING PAVANO to beat us…
I am beside myself with this umpire.
This would be a great time to get a hit Brett…for the first time in recent memory…
Whoops. Berkman is up. Forgot about him somehow…
Are you fucking KIDDING ME WITH THESE CALLS???? THAT WAS IN THE OTHER BATTERS BOX!!!!! COME ON YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE!!!! OR AT LEAST GIVE PETTITTE THE SAME STRIKEZONE???
Well, he missed that one in our favor…
BERKMAN RBI DOUBLE!!!!! 3-2!!!!
AND Gardenhire gets tossed. Fuck off loser. You have gotten SO MANY CALLS in this game it’s ridiculous. Hit the showers asshole.
GARDNER BUNT SINGLE!!!! 1st and 3rd with NO OUTS!!!!!
BURY THESE FOOLS!!!! DO IT NOW!!!!
CAPTAIN CLUTCH!!!!! RBI SINGLE!!!!! 4-2!!!!! 1st and 2nd with NO OUTS!!!! COME ON GRANDERSON!!!!
FINISH THEM!
GREAT bunt by Granderson…2nd and 3rd with 1 out…
WOW…IBB to Tex to bring up…ARod…bases loaded.
It’s time.
ARod has responded to this situation well throughout the year. Let’s see what happens…
ARod missed that one…right…down…the…middle.
0-2 right off the bat…
K’s meekly…Cano?
Between Swish and ARod…we could be up 10. How about not adding to the choking again Cano?
Why are they just swinging away??????
0-2 on 2 fucking pitches…
All we need is a single…
Should have let that one hit him…
Bases fucking loaded…1 out…ZERO FUCKING RUNS.
Just like the regular season. If they come back and win this fucking game…we left so many men on base with our meat at the plate.
Cano couldn’t lay off several high ones. Rauch throws soft for a 9 foot tall gorilla.
2 quick outs…get ’em Andy.
Pettitte is nails. What a great pitcher.
Outstanding 7th for Andy. He could come back for the 8th. Would it be better to save our bullpen or give them some work?
Good question…depends on if we can get some insurance this inning I think?
Swish…not a great postseason player so far.
Did anyone else hear the crowd shouting “We want Gardy” for Gardenhire when Gardner was up to bat? Just making sure that irony didn’t go unnoticed.
I try and ignore the fans crying over the strikezone when their pitcher benefited from it the entire game while ours didn’t…screw them. Bunch of hicks!!! ;)
2 quick outs…not good.
Got another on in ya Berkman???
Looks like Andy is done.
Wood?
1-2-3 8th…we need ONE GOOD INNING from the bullpen to get to Mo…ONE.
K for Wood!!!! SICK curveball…
2 outs…comebacker to Wood.
KKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!!!!!!! We’re going to the 9th…AWESOME job Kerry Wood!!!!
Gardner got a hit!!!! Hopefully that is the first of many…we need him on base…
Swinging bunt for Jeter…Brett to 2nd…1 out…
GARDNER STEALS 3RD!!!!!! NICE!!!! 3-0 to Granderson too!!!
Granderson…fucking awesome….3rd hit…RBI…5-2.
Gardner actually had an infield hit earlier in the game. I have to defend him since he and I are from the same town and he was in the same class of like 30 with my sister.
Tex JUST misses hitting it out…Delmon Young is a knob in LF. 2 outs.
You are from Charleston too??? My grandparents owned a house on Edisto Island for years, then built one of of 17 by the mall…awesome town!!!
I like Gardner dude, just using some good old negative reinforcement on him!!!
Goose Creek, right? I went to college with a girl from there too…
ENTER SANDMAN!!!
I’m from Holly Hill, Brett’s house is less than a mile from the house I grew up in. I live in Charleston, though.
Oh yeah, Holly Hill…my bad. I had many a fun night in Charleston.
Single…
DP. Awesome.
I loathe this umpire.
Same exact pitch…strike this time.
YANKEES WIN…THAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA YANKEES WIN!!!!!
Silence in Minny. Again.
IH was right…Berkman + playoffs = awesomeness
Gotta love all those disappointed faces in the crowd. Also gotta love the possibility of clinching at home. This whole team is playing well exce…and I just lost my train of thought hearing Lance Berkman speak for the first time. Wow. Ok…
Everyone but Swisher and Jeter are on so far. Jeter looks waaaaay too aggressive right now.
Can’t do much better than up 2-0 at this point…going back to the Bronx to finish these fools!!!
One last thought for the night:
Fuck Kid Rock
…and Pavano.
in your face porn-stache-guy…i mean, wtf, wouldn’t you think old friend alyssa milano would clue him in on how stupid he looks…
I am watching the sports shows and everyone is making a big deal about that one pitch…not even mentioning ALL THE FUCKING PITCHES HE DID GET THAT WEREN’T STRIKES THROUGHOUT THE GAME!!!!
Gotta love our all-around worthless media.
If you watch the MLB Network review show, they break down Pavano throwing 1st pitch strikes the first time through our order…like 2 of the pitches were actually strikes. It’s laughable.
lol.
Umps 2, Twins 0.
Has there ever been a poorer excuse for a freaking baseball team than the twins. In order of importance to the success of the Yankees the past five years:
Mo
Jeter
Twins.
yeah, espn is all over the “story” about a missed ball/strike call…funny…love the way they cherry-pick a play to make a moot point…they did offer some “perspective” by having tino martinez explain that the ump did set a pattern, which berkman confirmed he was looking for: pitches that were 6 inches outside would be strikes [sometimes], and pitches on the inside corner would be balls [frequently]…pavano’s first 3 pitches to berkman in that at bat were well outside the tbs strike box [one was even low]…he got one of them for a strike…maybe they were bitching that all 3 should have been strikes if the ump was more consistent with that pattern…not sure…the focus seems to be only on that one cherry-picked pitch, not the dozen or so others that pavano did get to go his way…seemed like pettitte had a similar strike zone, but he didn’t come unraveled…they talked a lot before the game too about certain twins changing their routine to help change their luck…maybe somebody should’ve talked the american “idle” into shaving off that nasty porn stache….haha
Umps 2, Twins 0.
Come on Brad…did you even watch the game? If you did there is no way you can say this.
The fact that James Shields still has the nickname “Big Game James” is a cruel joke. I’m sure hedoens’t even want the moniker anymore. Andy Pettitte on the other hand is all about the big games. What a performance. And Lance Berkman is only the latest exhibit proving the impressive worth of Kevin Long. Guys credit this guy more than any hitting coach in the league. He significantly improved Nick Johnson, Curtis Granderson, Lance Berkman, and Derek Jeter’s swings this year to get them out of slumps that were – for three of them anyway – the worst slumps of their careers.
And Kerry Wood looked absolutely phenomenal. His pitches move as much as AJ’s except they actually seem to go more or less where he wants (his control is cleraly not perfect but it is certainly around the plate). If he continues pitching as he has, the Yankees can shorten games to 7 innings.
I am not at all discounting the possibility that the Twins could come back – strangeer things have happened – but it would be great for Phil to finish these guys off so CC is rested for the ALCS. I’ve got tix to Game 5 so that result would mean no game for me, but I’ll take the series!!
I got tix for game 4, and I rather not go! ;)
Wow. Anyone watching the Reds implode against the Phillies in the 7th? Aroldis Chapman looks like he wants to wring his teammate’s necks. Can’t blame him.
1-2-3 first for PHRANCHISE!!! Great start…