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City of Palms Park, [spring training] home of the Red Sox, is asking for $800,000 to add what one official calls "pizzazz to the facility."

Living in NYC, we know that 800K doesn’t go nearly as far as it does down in Florida.  What gets you "pizzazz" in the Sunshine State might get you a powder room in West Chelsea.  But being designers, we had some ideas about just what might be waiting in the wings for the lucky patrons of CoPP:

  • Sushi bars behind both Sox’ dugout and bullpen (duh!)
  • State-of-the-art dunk tank with fully animatronic likenesses of Derek Jeter and Murray Chass
  • New modern concession stand featuring "JD Drew"-brand shin, ankle, forearm, elbow, mouth, and wrist guards.
  • "Manny being Manny Nanny" Day Care Center franchise behind left field bleachers (thanks to commenter Quo for the perfect name change!)
  • ADA-compliant revolving door to Red Sox’ bullpen

Get those blueprints ready!

16 comments… add one
  • Maybe the day care center could be “Manny being Nanny” instead?

    QuoSF January 10, 2007, 10:49 pm
  • YES! I haven’t posted in ages, but Quo’s quip on top of SF’s gag had me rolling. Way to go, Quo.

    Devine January 10, 2007, 10:55 pm
  • “Manny being Nanny”=hilarious
    SF, that’s a low blow equating Chass to our beloved Jeter. Is A-Rod too easy a target?

    Nick-YF January 11, 2007, 12:10 am
  • Manny being Nanny would have been much better – no surprise I didn’t think of it!

    SF January 11, 2007, 6:14 am
  • $800,000 worth of pizzas? did the sox sign david wells?

    Yankee Fan In Boston January 11, 2007, 8:57 am
  • More seriously, I imagine they plan to increase the press areas for the expected hordes of Japanese reporters.

    Paul SF January 11, 2007, 11:26 am
  • David Beckham is going to take his over-the-hill butt to play for the LA MLS team.
    Anyone think this is going to do anyting for the sport in the US, or just make a joke out of if as the Senior Circut for pro soccer?

    LocklandSF January 11, 2007, 11:29 am
  • “$800,000 worth of pizzas? did the sox sign david wells?”
    No, but from the looks of Big Papi, I would say he knows a thing or 50 about pies…
    (sorry, couldn’t let that Jeets dig go )

    Anonymous January 11, 2007, 11:53 am
  • That was me.

    Andrews January 11, 2007, 11:54 am
  • a real life geisha house just past the wall in center.

    Sports Bettor January 11, 2007, 12:42 pm
  • Anyone think this is going to do anyting for the sport in the US, or just make a joke out of if as the Senior Circut for pro soccer?
    We have a soccer Circut?

    Brad January 11, 2007, 12:57 pm
  • What’s a soccer?

    Nick-YF January 11, 2007, 1:38 pm
  • It’s someone who blogs about socks.

    SF January 11, 2007, 1:47 pm
  • Wait! I’m a soccer! I blog about the socks all the friggin time!
    Who knew?

    Brad January 11, 2007, 2:03 pm
  • every spring the twins rip out my heart by taking the highly esteemed mayors cup. could we use the $800,000 to get a replica cup? i’ve lost sleep over that damn cup.

    sf rod January 11, 2007, 2:04 pm
  • The Mayor’s Cup. A complete name rip-off of the esteemed cross country race held at Franklin Park every year that showcases the best and brightest young runners in the world.

    Brad January 11, 2007, 3:46 pm

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