How to Kill 17 Hours

When we went to bed last night, the Red Sox were en route to Japan. When we awoke this morning, the Red Sox were still en route to Japan. It can get pretty boring on an airplane for better than half a day. Thankfully, according to one of our team sources, the Red Sox players have found ways to amuse themselves.

How do you spend a 17-hour trip without someone dying before the end?

  • Duct tape Dustin Pedroia to the ceiling
  • Draw a handlebar mustache on Tito while he’s sleeping
  • Shave Manny’s dreadlocks, glue them to Kevin Youkilis’ head
  • Admire Jonathan Papelbon’s origami mastery
  • Interrupt Daisuke Matsuzaka’s and Hideki Okajima’s conversation with random shouts of, "I know, right?!?!?" even though they’re both speaking in Japanese
  • Two words: Strip cribbage
  • Sit next to Jason Varitek and whistle, "It’s a Small World" repeatedly until he cracks

Time sure flies when you’re in the air.

28 comments… add one
  • “…strip cribbage…”
    i’m glad i didn’t make that trip
    the last one made me spit coffee out of my nose…

    dc March 20, 2008, 11:06 am
  • Hysterical, Paul.

    SF March 20, 2008, 11:32 am
  • Strip cribbage should work
    For example:
    Just lose an article of clothing for every point you lose to Muggins (i.e. fail to score for yourself by oversight, which is seen by the opponent, who calls “Muggins”).
    It would give phrases such as “laying away crib busters” an interesting new angle, too…………

    dabize March 20, 2008, 11:38 am
  • 17 hours, no way. I would have stayed home! I get upset when flying to Vegas and my electronic devices lose their charge. No way a portable DVD or PSP lasts even half the trip!
    Did anyone ever watch Viva La Bam? Well one episode Bam took all of his dad’s clothes (EVERYTHING) and put iron-on hamburger decals on them right before he left for a trip. In my dream world that same thing would be done to all of Varitek’s clothes except they would use big red C’s instead of hamburgers! I would pay big money to see him walking around Japan with big red C’s all over his clothes!

    John - YF March 20, 2008, 12:09 pm
  • Interrupt Daisuke Matsuzaka’s and Hideki Okajima’s conversation with random shouts of, “I know, right?!?!?” even though they’re both speaking in Japanese
    For some reason I can absolutely see Dustin Pedroia doing this, which then leads us back to #1 on your list.

    SF March 20, 2008, 12:10 pm
  • “Duct tape Dustin Pedroia to the ceiling”
    At least you wouldn’t be wasting much Duct Tape.

    John - YF March 20, 2008, 12:11 pm
  • I can actually see Pedroia or Papelbon doing most of these.

    Paul SF March 20, 2008, 12:19 pm
  • they should try to see how many times they can get through “99 bottles of beer on the wall” or the “song that doesn’t end”…that would unhinge tek for sure…

    dc March 20, 2008, 12:49 pm
  • My favorite comment about the plane trip – of course Pedroia and Tito are going to be playing cribbage for a lot of it, so Dustin had this to say:
    “He stinks,” Pedroia said of the skipper’s cribbage abilities. “I feel like the Houston Rockets (against him).”
    Reminded that the Celtics [team stats] beat the Rockets Tuesday night, Pedroia amended his statement to the Celtics.

    Micah-SF March 20, 2008, 12:59 pm
  • That’s from the Herald, incidentally. Papelbon, on the other hand, plans to take everyone’s money in poker because he “doesn’t read books”.

    Micah-SF March 20, 2008, 1:02 pm
  • can i play strip cribbage with Matsuzaka and Okajima :)

    TJ March 20, 2008, 1:20 pm
  • Imagine how much money they threw around in poker games on that flight…

    krueg March 20, 2008, 1:24 pm
  • trying to explain to manny how his bracket is already busted. the only comeback he has is….”Mt. Saint Mary’s is a bad woman.”

    sf rod March 20, 2008, 1:36 pm
  • Paps is missing out. Books (and music) are what allowed me to survive the many Honolulu-Boston/New York flights I’ve taken in my life. Not exactly to Japan, but that HNL-Newark non-stop is about 11 hours, plus taxiing time. It sounds like a lot but if you think about it as just listening to, say, your 10 favorite albums, while reading a book or two (with a newspaper to mix it up), it goes by much quicker.

    FenSheaParkway March 20, 2008, 1:38 pm
  • The interesting part of the Herald article was the steps the Sox took to try to minimize jet lag — serving meals based on Japanese time (breakfast served last night), keeping lights on the plane lit during the Japanese daytime, urging players to sleep on the first leg of the flight but stay up the second leg so they could sleep upon arrival at 2 a.m.
    I wonder if any of it worked.

    Paul SF March 20, 2008, 2:09 pm
  • doubtful…can’t fool biology

    dc March 20, 2008, 2:20 pm
  • Really bored? Track the Red Sox team plane!

    LocklandSF March 20, 2008, 2:24 pm
  • “Imagine how much money they threw around in poker games on that flight…”
    No kidding. I can see Tek walking around saying, “Anyone up for a quick $5,000.00 buy in?”

    LocklandSF March 20, 2008, 2:28 pm
  • Hmm, according to that link, the Sox plane took off in Toronto and landed off the coast of Alaska… They’ve landed anyhow, according to my friendly AP NewsAlert.
    I’m lucky if I can afford a $5 buy-in game. I’ve always wished I made enough money where dropping $100 at poker wouldn’t matter to me. As it is, I get nervous when I’ve got $15 on the table…

    Paul SF March 20, 2008, 2:30 pm
  • $5 blackjack baby!!!

    krueg March 20, 2008, 2:58 pm
  • Imagine how much money they threw around in poker games on that flight…
    So that’s what the whole $40k thing was really about…

    pastorsteve March 20, 2008, 3:05 pm
  • anyone have any word on how the japanese press covered the happenings yesterday?

    sf rod March 20, 2008, 4:25 pm
  • Apparently it was front page on their Web sites, from what I read, but mostly quoting sources like the Globe…

    Paul SF March 20, 2008, 5:33 pm
  • According to Schilling on SOSH, Papelbon’s poker table was broken within 20 minutes of getting on the plane, and they had to play by draping a blanket over the back of a seat or cardboard box or some such.

    Paul SF March 20, 2008, 6:04 pm
  • > Duct tape Dustin Pedroia to the ceiling
    You don’t need tape. Just rub him in your hair really quickly and stick him up there like a static-clung balloon.

    attackgerbil March 20, 2008, 6:19 pm
  • AG owes me a new keyboard.

    rootbeerfloat March 20, 2008, 7:01 pm
  • wanna bet that dp is small enough to qualify as carry-on baggage and one of those guys stuffed him into the overhead compartment, or under the seat in front of them?…

    dc March 20, 2008, 10:46 pm
  • I think the “not dying” part will be problematic in some of those cases ;)

    RollingWave March 27, 2008, 5:05 am

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