To: All Staff
From: The Boss
I expect to win. No excuses. Each and every one of you people is accountable. We lose? There’ll be changes. Trust me. I’m not shelling out enough cash to reconstruct Iraq just to put on a good show. So there it is. I don’t care whether you’re hitting clean up—that means you Williams—or hawking Cracker Jack in the Tier Reserve; nothing short of victory is acceptable. I know I look sweet in those Visa ads, but don’t think I won’t let your butt go if things don’t work out. When it comes to firing, The Donald has nothing on me.
Anyway, try to relax and have a good time out there. New York loves you. Go Yankees!
PS: Gordon! Shave off that goddamn moustache!