Mad Libs! (Unprecedented Collapse Edition)

Choose the correct phrase (and no peeking!) to complete this story from a certain paper of record:

As mortified fans watch the [Red Sox/Mets] fritter away their once-commanding grip on first place in the [American/National] League East, dread infects the city that it might be witnessing a collapse of unprecedented proportions. Even those who far prefer the [Pats/Yankees] can’t escape the fact that such a nose dive would be downright humiliating to [Boston/New York].

How could they? How dare they?

[Patrick O’Shannon/John Glendinning], 53, a retired laborer from [Malden/Brooklyn] who goes by Whitey, is so agitated he can’t watch the games without losing his sense of civility. “I get too nervous,” he said. “I start throwing things at the wall.”

But, hey, calm down. Collapses happen.

Indeed, where would the city be without its grandiose collapses? The all-out falls from grace or riches or first place, or even a simple upright position, are a familiar and infuriating and perhaps even necessary part of the [Boston/New York] experience.

11 comments… add one
  • Good one. I’m going to say it’s the Mets given that few, if any, Bostonians I think would say they “prefer” the Pats over the Red Sox. At most they simply care more about the Pats.

    yf marrying sf September 21, 2007, 12:56 am
  • Ha, funny, YF.
    Mets disintegrated again last night. The ’78 comparisons seem more apt to the Mets, at least to me, since there’s a really good chance their collapse could leave to missing the playoffs entirely. Lost, somewhat, in the easy target of the Sox/Yanks rivalry, is the Mets remarkable slide. The national media (and Murray Chass, of course) would rather trot out tired themes with little relevance anymore (Sox fold to Yanks, always!) than show us what is going on with the team from Queens.

    SF September 21, 2007, 6:42 am
  • Is Willie going to be on the hotseat? Should he be? Or should Minaya? Neither?

    SF September 21, 2007, 6:46 am
  • Willie not likely to be on hotseat with Minaya, but certainly is with fans.
    Some things are starting to happen that really reflect badly on Willie though. Last night they were not even aware until late in the game that Wagner was unavailable even though his back was an issue before the game started.
    Reyes is looking bad, and the perception is compounded by how flashy/dancing/cocky he is when things are going well. People are getting pissed at him. Carlos Delgado, the only real veteran leader in the starting line-up is simply on the decline and has had some awful stretches this year.
    But the biggest issue lately, which is very similar to Boston, is that they can’t play innings 7-8 without disaster (last night it was 9, but it counts the same to me since their closer was unavailable). Their bullpen is just in shambles. They gave up TWO 4-run leads a few days ago and a 3-4un lead last night.
    Their record against their closest division rivals (Phillies) in their past 8 meetings? 0-8. Can you believe that?? That would be hard to do if you were trying to lose.
    It’s hideous and I thoroughly enjoy watching it (except for Willie, who I really like and hate to see get bashed like this).

    IronHorse (yf) September 21, 2007, 9:48 am
  • Oh, and I would have guessed New YOrk too because of the “Pats” reference, but when I read the following sentence, it made it clear to me that they must be talking about Boston:
    “The all-out falls from grace or riches or first place, or even a simple upright position, are a familiar and infuriating and perhaps even necessary part of the [Boston/New York] experience.”

    IronHorse (yf) September 21, 2007, 9:50 am
  • “Lost, somewhat, in the easy target of the Sox/Yanks rivalry, is the Mets remarkable slide.”
    Believe me, it isn’t lost on this fan. I’ve gone all Peter Jennings and started smoking again in the past week.
    Unrelatedly, did y’all see your shirt being featured on The Soxaholix this morning?

    FenSheaParkway September 21, 2007, 10:40 am
  • I actually like the Mets (and Willy!) and I hate watching them disintegrate before our very eyes. It’s downright bizarre how they seemingly find new and interesting ways to lose every time…like a particularly gruesome car wreck.

    yankeemonkey September 21, 2007, 10:42 am
  • ym, you are a Met fan as well? Do you live in NY? That is not a jab, I just can’t conceive of someone who lives here rooting for both. Do you?

    IronHorse (yf) September 21, 2007, 11:07 am
  • IH –
    I went to college with a kid from Long Island who is a big Mets fan, but would pull for the Yankees to do well, “for New York”. I don’t get it either, but it isn’t unprecedented.

    FenSheaParkway September 21, 2007, 11:30 am
  • I don’t like to see the Mets lose so horribly just because I like Willie so damn much. I would love him as the manager of the Yankees.
    But the pleasant part about this is how everyone was saying the Mets were clearly the team of New York now, comparing Reyes favorably to Jeter mostly only because he steals bases at a Hendersonian rate. Now he’s a bum. And how last year, when everyone was saying how David Wright clearly outclassed A-Rod. It just goes to show how the long view always wins out over the short, 2-month in-season bursts. Now, Reyes and Wright are two very good players, but would you really take them over A-Rod and Jeter? Earlier in the year, and last year too, everyone thought it was a no-brainer. But they still have a lot to prove before getting to Jeterian levels.
    Anyway, while I am sad for Willie, I am glad to see the Mets’ dynamic duo get knocked down a peg or two, even though David Wright is an outstanding offensive player. His defense, though, leaves a lot to be desired. He’ll probably be playing left field in the future.

    AndrewYF September 21, 2007, 1:32 pm
  • Agreed Andrew – every point.
    Am I right in thinking they have led the NLEast since day one? If so, I wonder if any team has led from day one and then lost the lead and with it a playoff spot in the last week of the season. That would really be hard to take for Mets fans. They have been pretty much assured of a playoff spot for months.

    IronHorse (yf) September 21, 2007, 1:58 pm

Leave a Comment

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Next post:

Previous post: