General Red Sox Humor The Media

Shorter (Longer?) Tony Massarotti

The Red Sox should have signed Mark Teixeira because it would only have cost them a couple of million dollars a year extra, especially in light of the fact that they haven’t dealt with Jason Bay’s free agency yet even though he’s not a free agent and they might not re-sign him (but they might, also). Also, JD Drew is dead while Johnny Damon is
not, even though I am going to list statistics that show Drew is better, but all that matters is that Damon is a free agent after this year and Drew is not.

I think that makes sense, but I am not sure. Oh, Coco Crisp is in Kansas City, too. Forgot to mention him. Theo really missed the boat on that guy, right?! I need to list a bunch of guys the Sox obtained thinking they’d be better than they were – let’s see.  Lugo. Wily Mo. Matt Young. Lugo. Jack Clark. Lugo. Nick Esask- no, wait, he had
vertigo, he didn’t actually suck. Still, vertigo? Seriously? I mean, that’s weak. I am a “torn ACL” career-ending injury kind of guy, not a “I can’t go up in that Ferris Wheel” kind of career-ending injury guy. But back to Teixeira. This column is about Teixeira and how he would have helped the Sox, especially because Ortiz is struggling. Lars Anderson Lars Anderson Lars Anderson I read SoSH Minor League forums. Oh, wait, you know what? I forgot, Ortiz wouldn’t have been replaced by Teixeira, Lowell would have, my bad, but I have to admit Lowell is really doing well.  Also,the Sox do have a lot of good prospects,
and they spend money, and that’s great and all but really it’s a lot less
relevant because they have guys on their roster who are dead. Like JD Drew. I wonder if they will find him in the Atlantic Ocean with those other Brazilian and French people. (Just kidding, it’s a metaphor, JD Drew isn’t dead!  He’s alive! Lugo? Not so sure, he might really be dead!). Now, let’s get back to Jason Bay, who might or might not be a free agent. Since we don’t know what’s going to happen in
November, I’ll just assume he will be a free agent, it makes things easier to imagine. I also need to mention Hanley Ramirez and how
the Sox traded him, in the context of the Teixeira non-deal. Why? It has to do with those two million dollars and prospects like Hanley, who are great players the Sox squandered for noth– wait, they won a World Series with Beckett? When? 

Ortiz is stuck on the Sox, Teixeira is on the Yankees, and Jason Bay is going to be a free agent at the end of the year. Unless he isn’t.

25 replies on “Shorter (Longer?) Tony Massarotti”

To be fair, Teix, thus far, has been hitting all his HR’s at home, with the new jacked up stadium. So maybe if he calls Fenway home his numbers wouldn’t be so high..
Actually, now that I think about it, I wonder if it’ll hurt his MVP chances if the new Yanks stadium gives up that many HRs..

Just finished the article.. wow, didn’t know JD vs Drew numbers were so close.

They’re not, Lar. Damon has a 113 OPS+, Drew a 120 OPS+ with better defense at a harder position. Damon wins on playing time, and that’s it. Massarotti just has no idea what he’s talking about.
Super-short Massarotti:
“I like Mark Teixeira, and Bicycles Swim Better Than Fish.”

Wow, indeed. I’d say that maybe Maz was too upset about the Globe’s union negotiations that he accidentally turned in his notebook instead of a column, except that that is an uncanny imitation of Maz’ regular jibber-jabber. I had to follow the link just to make sure it wasn’t a copy-and-paste job.
I think my favorite part was: “Sox’ failure to sign Teixeira now leaves them with something of a long-term predicament offensively.” Yes, because there will never be another hitter available again, ever.

Ya, I noticed some of the counting numbers were from the 30-40 games JD had on Drew, though it should count for something…
Maybe they weren’t close close, but they’re definitely closer than what I would expect them to be. Though maybe half of it is that it’s so much easier to get lost in the Yanks roster – you have ARod, Posada, Abreu, now Teix, and a few others the past years, and JD was always leading off, while for Drew I think should be a #3/5 hitter, though I haven’t paid enough attention to the Sox to know where he actually bats..

I think Paul must have meant over the last three years as in Massaroti’s comparison. If that’s the case though, games played is very important when comparing the two. The contract is spread out over the season – it’s still the same contract. Moreover, who did the Sox have to play when Drew wasn’t playing. I’m going to guess that those subs weren’t putting up Drew’s numbers.
I’d go to fangraphs and get win values, but SF rules this roost!

Yeah, Damon’s playing time largely makes up the difference — but then there’s the postseason, where Drew has been very good and particularly clutch, with three huge home runs and solid numbers in every series except one.

Damon has been worth 1 win more over the last three years. Offered without analysis :)

Wait, did the Sox choose Drew over Damon!? I thought they chose Drew over that guy in their minor league system who wasn’t very good, whose name nobody remembers because HE WASN’T AN OPTION. Oh, and Wily Mo.
I don’t understand why the two guys were lined up by Mazz, for any reason at all. And even then, he didn’t really show anything by lining them up other than that he has no aptitude for logic.
Next up, I’d like everyone to compare the re-signing of Jason Varitek to the Yankees’ acquisition of Nick Swisher. Please, discuss.

teixeira has matt holliday-esq splits.
hr’s= 12
avg= .330
obp= .416
slg= .743
hr’s= 6
avg= .237
obp= .361
slg= .485
i guess it would have been a great signing for the 10 games at yankee stadium, but i’ll still take the youk and lowell combo. watching mark in the playoffs last year really made me question his mental make up. he repeatedly opted to take walks and leave the onus to vlad for the big inning. he still had great numbers while managing to collect 0 extra base hits.

I think the fact that I grew up in Western Mass and have lived my adult life in New York State, never spending much time in the Boston area, and thus rarely being exposed to the Beantown sports media, has helped keep me a Sox fan all my life…

Tex’s home/road splits are off, I would guess, because he was horrible in April where the Yankees played a lot of road games, and then was stupendous in May where the Yankees played a lot of home games. Now, causation, correlation, I don’t see why Yankee stadium has much effect on Tex’s numbers, his homeruns are mostly no-doubt bombs to the second deck of the RF porch.
Mazz spends a lot of time on one point – the Red Sox would be much better off with Teixeira rather than, I guess, Ortiz, and the Yankees would be much worse off without Teixeira. While perfectly true, it’s not really interesting.
And any team in baseball would take Damon over Drew at this point in time, mostly due to their contract situations. Again, not very interesting, especially because, as SF noted, the Sox didn’t choose between Damon and Drew.

he repeatedly opted to take walks
I don’t even know what to do with this. Was Tex supposed to swing at shitty pitches just to prove he was a team player, “the MAN”? I just don’t buy this line of criticism in the slightest.

SF rod. Couple of factors:
The Yankees were on the road for most of April. April, as we all know, was a terrible month for Teixeira. There are a ton of reasons: he’s a notoriously slow starter, he had a wrist injury that he played through, he had no lineup protection. Whatever the reason, his home road numbers are going to be skewed by teh fact that the Yankees played a ton of games on the road when he was ice cold. If you look up his April home numbers, I bet they won’t be very good either.
I could not argue witha straight face that the stadium is not playing a huge role in his power splits. Clearly a lefty power hitter is going to hit more homeruns at the new yankee bandbox, i mean stadium, than he will on the road. But if you think Mark Teixeira is a .237 hitter on the road, then I respectfully disagree.
As for his post season performance: I never get why people give people griefing for taking walks in the post season. The same thing happened to Ted Williams. What are they supposed to do, swing at balls? If they do, then they are going to do something worse than “take a walk”: they will make out. Obviously, hitters are much less likely to get hits on balls than strikes. They will make more outs if they swing at more balls. This will absolutely not help a team. Absolutely. Besides, I think its way too early to judge Teixeira as a postseason player. Definietely need more ABs.
Paul SF, sorry I misunderstood the relevant period for the Damon/Drew comparison.

I don’t see why Yankee stadium has much effect on Tex’s numbers, his homeruns are mostly no-doubt bombs to the second deck of the RF porch.
same could be said for damon.
Was Tex supposed to swing at shitty pitches just to prove he was a team player, “the MAN”? I just don’t buy this line of criticism in the slightest.
well, angel fans thought they finally got the big bat that would protect vlad for their playoff run. turns out they got a singles hitter with a great eye in clutch situations.

Sf rod: Sample size? Kinda small when you’re looking at one playoff series, no?
And, would it have been better if they had singles hitter who got on base less because he kept swing at slop? You mean to tell me he would have been hitting 3-1 sliders in the dirt for homeruns if he only had the “mental make up” to swing at them?

You mean to tell me he would have been hitting 3-1 sliders in the dirt for homeruns if he only had the “mental make up” to swing at them?
Vlad does!
Kidding. You’re right, of course.

with a great eye in clutch situations
Um, maybe the pitchers didn’t give him squat to hit in those clutch situations, because he’s such a good hitter.

083- i hear ya. just going off what i saw.
as far as “slop” and “shitty pitches” went, that wasn’t really the case. no one was pitching around mark to face vlad with runners on. was the crap pitching what culminated in his power outage as well?
ask our resident angel fan about his feelings on marks playoff debut?

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