The Year Ahead

Imagining the coming onslaught of prognostications, and considering the winter of their discontent, visions of the legion of Yankees fans making their annual calls came streaming into my head over the weekend.  This is what I saw:

  • AL East – Yanks
  • AL Central – Whichever team does best against the Yanks
  • AL West – See AL Central
  • AL Wild Card – The Sox f**king suck, probably not them.
  • National League – Who cares, unless we’re playing them in interleague games.
  • ALCS – Like it matters who we play.
  • NLCS – See NL regular season predictions.
  • World Series – See ALCS predictions.
  • AL MVP – Probably A-Rod, but it could also be Unit, or Jeets, or even Mo.  Somebody from the Yanks, no matter what.
  • AL Manager of the Year – Joe.  BEST F**KING MANAGER EVER.
  • AL Comeback Player of the Year – Giambino
  • AL GM of the Year: George Steinbrenner
  • AL Cy Young: The guy who used to play for Arizona who’s not a loudmouthed asshole. 

Over the next week, we’ll check in to see just how absurd these really seem. 

(And did I mention that the Sox suck, too?)

13 comments… add one
  • Awesome! I’m now, like, TOTALLY absolved from the prediction racket!

    YF March 28, 2005, 11:01 am
  • pretty reasonable predictions actually.
    I might be biased in this view but I think Red Sox fans are more self-centered than any other group of fans in the country. Look at your local book store, check out the coming movie season. These guys feel that the rest of the country needs to experience what they experienced. What narcissists!

    Nick March 28, 2005, 3:29 pm
  • As a Sox fan, can I just say that I support ‘Fever Pitch’ in less ways than one. That would be zero, for those Yankee fans out there that can’t count. Did you know that Jimmy Fallon has actually said he’s been a fan of three teams in his lifetime– the Mets, the Yankees, and the Sox. I for one am ashamed to have that representing Red Sox Nation (and I don’t mean the morons with membership cards either). Thank you. And also, even in Rhode Island bookstores, which I am in quite often, since I live here, there are just as many Yanks books as Sox books, so don’t try to tell me that we go overboard. I doubt there is one positive Sox book in any store in New York, so at least we’re kind of respecting of Yankees fans (or not). Once again, Thank you.

    Laura March 28, 2005, 7:25 pm
  • Yeah, fans who bond together over losses that cut to thewir quick, call each other during crucial moments in games to have someone to be in the moment with them, and who pass their love of a franchise and a team from generation to generation are the zenith of ‘self-centered.’ Nice try Nick, but no ring for the Yanks agian!

    sithkhan March 29, 2005, 1:41 am
  • Yankee fans think they are invincible. They were up 3-0 last year, and those invincible yanks showed how great they really were. I’ll end this by saying “Who’s Your big papi” and “2000!!!”

    belknap March 29, 2005, 7:24 pm
  • now in all honesty, here are my predictions
    AL East – Yankees by a few games
    AL Central – Whitesox
    AL West – Anaheim
    AL Wild Card – Red Sox
    National League – Probably Houston
    ALCS – Sox over Yanks in 5
    NLCS – Houston over Mets in 6
    World Series – Sox over Houston in 7, and Roger Clemens cries on the mound after giving up a 2 run hr to lose the game.
    AL MVP – Big Papi
    AL Manager of the Year – w/e the whitesox manager is
    AL Comeback Player of the Year – Juiceboy Giambi(i’ll settle there)
    AL GM of the Year: Theo (and george isn’t the gm btw, Cashman is, smart one)
    AL Cy Young: we’ll go with Schill

    belknap March 29, 2005, 7:31 pm
  • Belknap go suck a fat dick! Thank Kevin Brown and the local pharmacist. No steroids, no pain killers in baseball. Lets see how lucky you guys are this next millenium. 26-6

    El Duque March 31, 2005, 12:27 pm
  • Time Out! This is a family website. Let’s keep it (reasonably) clean, thank you.

    YF March 31, 2005, 1:52 pm
  • I meant Dick Cavet.

    El Duque March 31, 2005, 8:38 pm
  • ya i know, keep this g rated. And I love this…Yankee fans tell me not to live in the past, and get over our win. What was that bullcrap about 1918??? How can you tell me not to live in the past, then go tell me we hadn’t won in 86 years? I don’t care. We’re world champs for the whole year AT LEAST and NOBODY can take that ever. Hope you watch the ring ceremony in a few nights.

    belknap April 4, 2005, 6:56 pm
  • nice rings ;)

    belknap April 12, 2005, 6:39 pm
  • how bout them yanks :) 37-37

    belknap June 26, 2005, 4:23 pm
  • wow those predictions i made were pretty damn good…probably should have m entioned ozzie guillen by name tho

    belknap December 19, 2005, 3:21 am

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